Day 29: {What Keeps Me Going}
I am not sure I would say that I have ever thought I would just throw the towel in but there certainly have been days that I needed a bit more motivation than others. Every day my motivation is different and I am working hard to create new motivators by using my experience to teach and help others. The important thing is that I JUST.KEEP.GOING. A good birth mom friend of mine shared this thought at our last retreat and it really made me think about my life and how I choose to look at it. We all have trials. We all suffer grief and heartache at some point in our lives. We all get to deal with the outcome of our choices, whether they are good or bad.
I pray every day for the strength to love my choice to place my child because of the joy that it brings to another family and the good life and love it has brought to my daughter. Are there things I would change now? Maybe. Are there times when I wonder how life would be if I had decided to keep her? Absolutely. What keeps me going is the knowledge that my sacrifice was for an important reason that sometimes I can’t even truly understand. In the end, we all belong to God and only He knows the reason for our trials and the ultimate outcome of our choices. It’s our job to see and be grateful for the blessings. What I know in my heart is that everything will be made clear in the end and I will be become whole again. There are blessings to be had that we can’t comprehend. We just have to be patient.
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