Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Birth Mom Photo a Day 19: Life After Placement

Day 19: {life after placement}
My hopes for my life after placement were all based around turning what I thought was my tragedy into my fairy tale. Is my life a fairy tale now? Not really...but its pretty darn good.
The day of placement, I went home with my Grandma and slept for about 3 days. I was physically and emotionally exhausted. I went home to California for a couple weeks to be with my mom while I physically healed and then made plans to return to Utah to live with family and try to get ready for college. I got a letter one day from a high school friend asking me if I was interested in moving to Provo and being her roommate. I was so excited!! That opportunity to get back to "being my age" was the very thing I needed at the time and until then, I wasn't sure how it would happen. I registered for school, signed my lease and packed up my little car to meet them in Provo. Those college years were so fun for me and I have no doubt that my friend was prompted to contact me for a reason because she knew I needed her. She is one of my best friends to this day. Its thanks to the people that were there to give me encouragement that I kept pressing forward during that fragile time.
That was 19 years ago. I have since graduated college, married and had 4 more awesome kids and have a great career. Life has not been perfect, but it has been good. Would I have accomplished all these things if I had chose to parent her? Maybe. But everything happens for a reason and things have a way of turning out, even when they feel like they can't. I have finally come to realize that my experience was not a tragedy. It was a blessing. A blessing that made me who I am today and led me to the life I have today. Life is what you make it and there is, most certainly, life after placement for a birth mother.

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